So today has just been one of those days. You know, the kind where the day starts off wrong and it all goes down-hill from there? Instead of listing the negatives, I thought I would list the positives and see if I could put a good spin on it before I go to bed.
1- I got an unplanned, extra hour and twenty minutes of sleep!
2- I listened to Paramore on the way to work!
3- I was busy for the first 2 hours of work....
4- Aubrey and I signed up for a shared Costco membership!
5- I got 2 of my favorite things for lunch: Lucky Charms and Dr. Pepper!
6- Aubrey and I discovered that the recently taken away "Google Chat" at work, mysteriously works again!
7- I wiped out at FHE!
8- I got to watch my favorite "Bachelor" reject, Melissa, on Dancing With The Stars!
9- I took a LONG, HOT shower! The kind that beats your skin until it's red!
10- I'm ending the night by watching Christian Bale in "Newsies" with my roommates!
Ok... so I guess the good outweighs the bad!
So yesterday, I was taken down memory lane for a bit. Let me start at the beginning....
Saturday, my mom called me while I was at work to let me know that my sister, Emilee was being hospitalized. I'm sure most of you have read my other posts that explain about how her Cystic Fibrosis has affected her life, if you haven't go back and find them. Anyway, she was in the hospital not too long ago and when she left she was doing really well. She was working out everyday without oxygen, she was strong and healthier than she has been since High School.
Well I guess when a virus invades her body, it doesn't really matter how strong she is... it slows everything down. On Saturday when they woke my 4 (almost 5!) year old niece up to tell her the news, they could see she was trying to be really strong. Once Emilee said the words "It's ok to cry", she broke down. I can't imagine what this little girl is going through. For 2 weeks, AT LEAST, she is away from her mom Sunday night through Friday morning. She gets to spend the weekend up there and has to come right back home. On weekdays, while Ben is at work, she is passed around from Grandma to Grandma, From Aunt to Uncle.... It breaks my heart.
I decided Saturday that I would take a drive up there on Sunday. I had bought Cambree "High School Musical 3" fruit snacks earlier that she has been looking for everywhere and I thought they might cheer her up. When I got there, she crawled up on my lap, put her arms around my neck and wouldn't let go. I could tell something was wrong. I knew she probably needed to get out. So we walked all around the University of Utah hospital. Up and down the elevator, racing through the different hallways, looking through the big glass windows. All of it reminded me of doing this most of my life up there. Of course up until Emilee was about 20 or a little older it was Primary Childrens, then University of Utah.
As I drove home that night, I realized that not only have I spent a lot of time up there, but Emilee has spent a portion of her life up there. Spending a lot of time by herself, spending time with friends when they could come see her and spending time with family always on the weekends. I don't know if I have ever fully comprehended what she goes through and now that I do, it breaks my heart. At the same time, I admire her. She is my ultimate example. She has gone through things that no one could even imagine, yet she is still the most spiritual, loving, kind, intelligent, wonderful, beautiful person I have ever met. She, Ben and Cambree mean the world to me and I could not ask for better family. I love them with all of my heart.
It turns out the High School Musical 3 fruit snacks and watching High School Musical 1 with Cambree cheered her up! She is the light of my life. She is not only my niece and sometimes like the little annoying sister I never had... :) but she is my best friend. I don't know how it is possible for a 4 year old to be a 20 year olds best friend, but it is for me. She is getting wise beyond her years with what she experiences in life.
Wow, I didn't mean to go so in depth on this one... I guess looking at everything, I know that my life is not so bad. Even when it does get bad, I know the Lord is there for me through everything. I don't know where I would be without him, without the Gospel or without Christ. I am so grateful for the power of prayer. Especially at times like this. Times when it's not me who I pray for... it's my family and my friends. I am also grateful for how the Atonement has blessed my life. I guess this is another testament to me that life is short. Why waste any minute of it, doing things that you're not supposed to be doing when you could be taken at any minute?
When it rains- Paramore
And when it rains,
On this side of town it touches, everything
Just say it again and mean it,
We don't miss a thing
You made yourself a bed,
At the bottom of the blackest hole.
And convinced yourself that it's not the reason,
You don't, see the sun anymore.
And oh, oh, how could you do it?
Oh, I, I never saw it coming
Oh, oh, I need the ending,
So why can't you stay just long enough to explain?
And when it rains,
Will you always find an escape?
Just running away,
From all of the one's who love you,
From everything
You made yourself a bed,
at the bottom of the blackest hole.
And you'll sleep till May and you'll say,
that you don't want to see the sun anymore.
And oh, oh, how could you do it?
Oh I, I never saw it coming.
Oh, oh, I need the ending,
So why can't you stay just long enough to explain?
Take your time
Take my time
Take these chances to turn it around,
Just take these chances, we'll make it somehow.
And take these chances, we'll turn it around,
Just turn it around....
And oh, oh how could you do it?
Oh I, I never saw it coming.
Oh, oh, how could you do it?
Oh I, I never saw it coming.....
